Monday, February 14, 2011

dont worry its just me

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Love through the ages:

1. Doug Hous*n, second grade, huge crush on him until i saw him get pushed on the ice and see a snot ball evacuate his nose. His family moved away in third grade, wrote in my diary i was "glad to see him go"

2. Grades 3-6 not really "into it"

3. Simultaneous crush on the three dudes in grades 7, 8 who were into nature and comic books. They would all draw smily faces on their hands and make them talk with a british accent, these characters (the hands, not the dudes) were known as a family called "the sturgeons" and not even the jocks could fuck with their sheer ingenuity and whimsy. also crush on my neighbour's cousin, Nathan, who drew pictures of Marvel characters and grudgingly gave props to a carefully finger-smudged portrait of Pope John Paul referenced from his Time cover. We played soccer and talked some about Our Lady Peace. I found out he was allergic to grass and thought it'd be cool to rig up a bag of grass and have it dump on his head when he'd walk through a door.

4. had a crush on a dude on my bus who had a face like a sexual deviant and told everyone he was "probably going to be a doctor or scientist". Crush ended when I heard him shit talk my older brother when I appeared to be sleeping.

5. had a crush on a guy in grade 9 who on the first day of grade 10 showed up with a cloth bandage eyepatch which i thought was fuckin' siiiick. also, a different guy who is now (probably) a failed OHL player who grinded (ground?) me the first dance of highschool and insisted on shaking my hand every time i'd see him afterwards, in what now appears to be a gesture meant to dispirit.

6. had a crush in grade 12 on a dude who would pick me up at school and take me to burger king to get "cinamini's" with a coupon. driving me back to school he would explain to me that university was totally different, and you write essays differently.


Amy said...

are these the kids you once referred to as "a group of avant gard cartoonists i knew in the 4th grade"?

Amy said...

also, that's true, about the essays.

bilyana said...

amy: yes it is, turns out i wanted to get family hugged by all of them!